Stacey Greenberg
1. Why do women breastfeed?
a. Because they enjoy getting horrified stares in public.
b. Because bottles are too hard to keep track of.
c. Because it provides excellent nutrition for the baby and aids in building a healthy attachment to the mother.
2. How do you know your newborn baby is getting enough breast milk?
a. Breast milk alone is not sufficient, you must supplement with formula.
b. Weigh him/her on a scale before and after feedings.
c. Pay attention to your baby’s cues and the contents of his/her diapers.
3. When is the best time to wean your child?
a. At birth.
b. At one year.
c. Whenever you and/or your child feel it is mutually beneficial.
4. Where is the best place to nurse?
a. At home, in your bedroom, with the curtains drawn.
b. In a discreet location, like a bathroom.
c. Where ever you damned well please!
5. If someone says something inappropriate or judgmental to you while you're nursing in public...
a. Listen to them.
b. Squirt milk in their eye.
c. Inform them that it is your legal right to nurse in public and that you are feeding and caring for your child.
6. What does breast milk taste like?
a. Ew!
b. Like cow’s milk?
c. Mild, sweet, and delicious.
7. Who benefits from breastfeeding?
a. Formula Companies.
b. Babies.
c. Mothers, Fathers, Babies, and Society as a whole.
8. What's the best way to deal with a nursling who bites?
a. When a baby has teeth, it's time to quit nursing!
b. Bite the baby back.
c. Remove him/her from the breast while sternly saying no.
9. You're nursing your easily distracted toddler in the mall. Something catches her eye, and she pops off the breast to see, leaving you bare-breasted and squirting. You:
a. Are still nursing a toddler?
b. Immediately crawl under your bench and hope death comes swiftly and soon.
c. Make sure your excited baby doesn't hurl herself on the floor and then guide her back to nursing.
10. What should you do about nursing your baby after you return to work?
a. Wean now so your baby will be used to formula.
b. Breastfeeding and working do not mix.
c. Bring your baby to work with you if possible, visit during the day, or get yourself a high quality breast pump. (Your work place is legally required to provide a place for you to express milk.)
11. What do formula companies do to undermine the breastfeeding process?
a. Mail free formula samples & coupons to pregnant women.
b. Mail free formula samples & coupons to doctors and hospitals.
c. Publish free magazines with formula ads and coupons on every page.
d. Mail these magazines to pregnant women, new mothers, doctors, and hospitals.
e. Perpetuate the image of babies using bottles as natural.
f. Put profits before nutrition.
g. All of the above.
12. What is a Lactivist (Lactation Activist)?
a. Someone who breastfeeds.
b. Someone who breastfeeds in public.
c. Someone who smiles at a breastfeeding woman.
d. Someone who provides a comfortable place for women to breastfeed.
e. Someone who educates others on the benefits of breastfeeding.
f. Someone who lobbies for pro-breastfeeding legislation.
g. All of the above.
Scoring:
For questions 1-10 give yourself 0 points for every a answer, 5 points for every b answer, and 10 points for every c answer. For questions 11 and 12, give yourself 5 points if you answered a-f and 10 points if you answered g.
100+ Congratulations! You are a Lactivist! You are well informed on the benefits & politics of breastfeeding and believe that breast is best! Time to order your Lactivist t-shirt and tell the world!
50-100 You’re getting there. Maybe you like the idea of breastfeeding, but don’t fully understand what it entails and its impact on society. Do some research, talk to women who breastfeed, and learn more.
0-50 Wake up and smell the breast milk. I hope that this quiz sparked your curiosity and you will take it upon yourself to find out what all the hooplah is about.
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